Don't Get Over It or Let it Go

“Get over it” and “Just let it go” were two lessons I was taught.  I tried to ignore my feelings, I tried to get over it but I couldn’t. I could only pretend that I wasn't hurt and that only hurt me more.
  
When I was in 7^th grade a boy called me a whale on my school bus and everyone laughed at me. I sat in my booth and hid my face while I cried.  I told someone what had happened to me while tears were running down my face. They said, " Don't let it bother you" I thought that I was wrong for being hurt by that boy and that he had a right to say what he did. 

Now I think differently about the situation. The boy who said this to me was a boy friend of mine that I had recently broken up with because he treated me poorly. I believe now that he said what he did because he was upset and that he really needed to say “Emily, you hurt me” Instead he said what ever he could in order to hurt me like I had hurt him. I did not deserve those harsh words because when I did break up with him, I was kind, discrete and I had good reason to.It would have helped me back then f my loved one had said, “Emily, you did not deserve that.”

Over the years I have been disrespected by many people. I believed that I was getting hurt because of a character flaw of my own, that I was too sensitive. Why wouldn’t people walk all over me and disrespect me? I let them, I never said anything to defend myself. I thought that I was doing what I was suppose to in order to make it stop, trying to just get over it and let it go but I couldn't.

However by not sticking up for myself and not respecting myself only made these problems worse. Some friends of mine took advantage of me and hurt me. This happened for years and I let it. I often wonder, if I were told what I needed to hear instead of what I didn’t would I have been a stronger person? If I were taught to respect myself would I have been hurt all of those years?

I still battle with my low self esteem today. I try to reverse the lessons that have been burned into my mind. I teach myself that it is OK to say how I feel, alright to have hurt feelings and brave to speak my mind. 

I still  question and doubt myself  a lot of the time. Being assertive and sticking up for myself is hard for me to do when I have negative thoughts running through my mind.

I long for honesty and respect from the ones I surround my self with. I know that I have to be respectful and honest in order to find and deserve people like this.  I would like to be honest and I would like the same in return.

I have come along way from the girl I once was. I know now what I should and should not do in order to be respected. I never want to try to “Get over it” or to “Just let it go” with out helping how I feel first.

Deserving & Giving Respect

When I think about what is beyond the planets that mankind already knows about my mind will shut down. I cant imagine what is out there and where this place that I am living in stops. My brain also shuts down when I start wondering about what happens after death. Some people are 100% sure that there is a heaven and a hell and some think that there is nothing. Who should I believe?

What I do think is that there is no possible way to be 100% sure about what comes after death. That it all comes down to what you believe to be true. I have to Get This Out Of My Head. I get a little annoyed when people try and convince others that what they believe is right. How can some people be that confident? There is no physical proof of anything that happens after we die only old books and stories.(as far as I know)

I do feel that everyone has the right to believe and follow whatever they choose to. However when someone disrespects another for not agreeing with what it is they do, well that really pisses me off. How can some people think that they have it all figured out and that everyone should see things the way they do? Have they ever tried to see things through another persons eyes? I respect the ones who can speak there beliefs and opinions but the ones who are also willing to hear the same from others.

Respect goes much further than just what is after death. Unfortunately there is many ways to disrespect the people who are sharing this world with you.Would you put someone else down because they don't love like you do? Why should you be the one to tell someone else what kind of person they should love or be intimate with? I think that anyone's feelings would be hurt if they were told that the person they love is not the right choice for them. Being gay is one example of how to love. There are so many people out there who are against gay rights and again, why are they so confident? How do they know it is wrong? There is no proof to say that being gay is not right. Gay people are not spontaneously com-busting everywhere. Instead they seem to be getting hurt by the ones who do not except them, how is that right?


Would you be offended if someone would not choose to eat what you do? I have been  told that my diet (vegan) is wrong. It  frustrates me because it usually comes  from the people who don't have any information about it at all. People who mostly get there nutritional knowledge from advertisements and I have done a lot of research over the past few years to find out how food effects your health. It hasn't been easy resisting the foods that I once loved but I am a vegan now and proud to be. However, just because I have chosen this lifestyle  it does not mean that I will tell you how you need to eat. I could be wrong but I have heard the facts from both sides and have made my decision and have never felt better.



It is impossible to be perfect in everyone's eyes. Having an open mind is great way to think but you can change yourself to become better and there will always be someone out there who does not think you are right for being who you are. I use to live for everyone else. I tried to be what they wanted me to be and I lost myself along the way but I came back. I have since realized that this is my life and I only get one. My future is awaiting me and I want it too look how I see it, not how they do.


What about insects and small creatures, do they deserve respect?  Some people I know say that they don't deserve to live. Why? They were put onto this planet along with us. Is it because they are small? Babies are small should we squish them, no. Is it because they have no feelings, families or worth? I think that if you were shrunken down to there size you would see the love and meaning to there lives. I think that most human beings take there bodies for granted. I also wonder if dinosaurs were to come again and started squishing and killing all of us would people then understand that just because you are little you still deserve a right to life? When a bug comes into my house instead of stepping on it I capture it and let it go outside. It is the least I could do because after all our house was built right on top of theirs.


How can you be respected if you don't give it? To me everyone and everything deserves respect if it's given back. I also think that there is no way for someone to be a 100% right.  At least no way to be right in everyone's eyes. It does not feel good to be disrespected. You may be be upset with my words right now. You could feel angry and offended with what I have to say. I am sorry if this is true but I have a right to my own opinion and I would love to hear and try to respect yours too..

Cloudy With A Chance Of Ignorance

What defines a hippy to you? A tree hugging weirdo or someone who cares for the planet and all its living things?  I get really pissed off when  people do not respect animals, people and this world. If that makes me a weirdo hippy than so be it. I would much rather be someone who gives a shit than some one who doesn't. What defines an ignorant person to me? Someone who ignores all warnings and someone who thinks that they have it all figured out with no research to prove it.

Why am I writing about this today? Yesterday Massachusetts (the state where I live) had 7 confirmed touchdowns of tornadoes. This is shocking because it is rare to even have one tornado in this area never mind 7. What comes across your mind when you hear about Global Warming? Do you think, oh god not again? Or do you believe that it could potentiality be the end of you and your loved ones some day in the future? It boggles my mind when I hear that some people do not believe its real and that it is happening. Maybe it is their way of avoiding anything real or even anything that scares them or maybe they really don't believe.

How is it that people can turn a blind eye to science? Do some people think that scientist are in there labs making this stuff up to scare and worry you? To me global warming is absolutely real. I take the words of the ones who know about it best,  the ones who have done the research and the ones who took the time to find out. They are the ones I believe to be right, not the older generation who are saying, "everything's fine" while sitting back in there reclining chairs, driving there gas guzzling cars.I will not be one of the people who takes this world for granted.

If you are unsure about how you feel about global warming I would suggest that you please take the time to learn about it. It could effect every single person that you know and love someday if more people don't start changing the way they live. One of the most ignorant things a person could do in my opinion is to turn a blind eye to this, or wait until it is too late to do something about it.

 Have you ever seen a global disaster movie? The scenes where shit is hitting the fan and everyone is hysterical? With the crazy "hippy" on the side of the sidewalk that is holding a sign that says its coming? If you didn't believe that global warming was real and disaster strikes us one day would you feel stupid while  running for your life and saw that hippy holding there sign that  said stop global warming before it is too late?

Global warming has the power to crush this planet and everyone living on it. It could send tsunami waves to places that have never seen one before. It could create devastating tornadoes and earthquakes around the world. It could lead to terrifying things and ultimately, the end of this world and most importantly everything on it..

On the bright side there is a way to prevent these terrible things from happening and yes they are all things the typical hippy would do. Start recycling, stop wasting and start caring. If everyone could just change one thing that they do that is wasteful it could help to improve this global warming dramatically. Use a reusable bottle and an under the sink water filter to replace all the wasted plastic drinking bottles. Even the smallest change like not using paper plates anymore could make it much safer living on the skin of this world.

I have to Get This Out Of My Head, It is ignorant to take life for granted and to turn a blind eye to the warnings. To think that you know everything without even finding out is something a lazy person would do. The people who take time to care and who takes the time to learn are the ones I respect and will listen too.

If you would like to learn about global warming click on the world pictures on this post. I have linked them to informative videos that can help you become better informed about what global warming is, what it can do and most importantly, how to help prevent it.

Your Too Sensative

 Have you ever been told that you are too sensitive? Or have you ever said it to someone? I think that statement is an insensitive persons excuse for not having to deal with any real emotions. Why do so many people think that being sad or hurt is a weakness? Humans are designated to be emotional and to hurt. Why are so many not acknowledging and expressing there feelings? Most people are choosing to hide them away inside of themselves. If you do that and choose  to not deal with your feelings they can become bigger and hurt even more. They may not be on your mind day to day but they are there just waiting to come out.

Have you ever seen an angry alcoholic or drug addict? Ever wonder if the reason they get so angry is because  they are upset about something? Often times addictions are developed from someone trying to block out there uncomfortable feelings, I can not tell you how many times I have tried to talk to someone and have gotten that statement said to me. Up until a few years ago I actually believed them. I thought that I was to sensitive and needed to try and not care so much. ...Bull shit.

I do care and that is OK. I do  get upset if you use me or make me feel bad. I recognized that I have feelings now and I know how to express them. For  years I felt wrong to say how I feel and felt that if I talked to others that it would only upset them and make me feel worse about myself.

Now I know that it is OK and normal to be sensitive. I have to stop trying to talk to the ones who don't know how to communicate appropriately and find the ones who do.Over the past few years I have been learning how to communicate better. If I am angry at Justin I don't tell him I am pissed and yell at him. Instead  I try and tell him calmly. I usually say,"there is something that I need to talk to you about" and then I would tell him how I am feeling and why. I go to him calmly because I don not want to trigger his defensiveness.

I  have also learned how to not be so defensive when someone confronts me. It is very easy to turn a conversation around. For example, I say, "I am upset because you called me stupid" then you immediately say, "you called me stupid too" That is turning it around or deflecting someones feelings. I try to consider other peoples feelings instead of busting out my own. Feelings are real, emotions are real and everyone has them. Some people may be able to hide them  better than others  by not crying and acting tough instead but they have them too. I believe that the strong minded people are the ones who can cry and the ones who can admit to being hurt and It is the weak minded ones who are too afraid to.

I am trying very hard to make sure that I can communicate properly. It means a lot to me to make sure that my  daughter Lily has a mother who she can talk to. I also want to show her that it is ok to be hurt or angry. I would love for her to feel comfortable enough to come to me when she is upset with someone or even with myself. I want to listen and be there for her  and in order to do so I need to lead by example and do it for myself. So I am doing it right now, I am talking to you, to who ever will listen and it feels oh so good to Get This Out Of My Head!

 

Stopping The Cycle

I don't know about you but I grew up eating mostly unhealthy foods. Things like Eggo waffles for breakfast, chicken nuggets for lunch, sugary crap for snacks, I drank mostly soda and meat and potatoes for dinner. Yes, all of these foods are delicious but are also not good for your health. I have been overweight my entire life and struggle with it every day. I became a vegetarian about 6 years ago and just this month switched to being vegan (no animal products what so ever) I feel great and have already lost a few pounds.

The reason I became a vegetarian and vegan was for animal rights. The animals are treated horribly and I told myself that if I was going to continue to eating animal products the LEAST I could do was see how it was made and that did it for me. It bothers me when people tell me that animals are meant to be eaten and can not think or feel. Why do most people feel as though humans are the only species that deserves a chance at a fair, happy life? Now I could see if I were stranded in the wild and needed to hunt down a rabbit to survive. Sure, I would do that but now a days people can survive without any animals products what so ever and be very health while doing so.

Soon after becoming a vegetarian I realized that I was not only doing it for the animals, I was  doing it for my health as well. Studies have shown that vegans live very long and healthy lives. Even vegan  kids have been shown to develop more muscle mass and often have higher IQs than kids who eat animal products. My daughter is one year old and  has been a vegetarian ever since she was growing in my belly and she is now a vegan too.

Most people are shocked when I tell them that I am a vegan and they usually assume that I only eat fruits and vegetables but that is not true. Since going vegan I have eaten a lot of yummy foods like french fries, sandwiches, pastas, stir frys and so much more. Many people also think that by not eating animal products that they will be mineral and vitamin deficient but this is also  not true.Vegetarians and vegans usually eat many more foods that are high in vitamins and minerals that common meat eaters do. I heard a lady say recently that she believes that if you put fear into your body in the form of animal products (because they lived a scary, sad life) that the fear and sadness will effect you too. I believe her now because I am relaxed and happier.


Did you know that soy milk is healthier than cows milk and that cows milk became "the healthy milk" because of successful advertising? We are the only species that drinks the milk of another animal too, WEIRD! You don't see a beaver nursing on a gorilla do you? American television has been advertising unhealthy foods to us ever since we were kids and ever since our parents were kids as well. Sugary cereals, deserts for breakfast, and saturated fats are just a few. I REFUSE to raise my daughter on the foods that I ate growing up. I feed her healthy whole foods with no added salt, sugars, chemicals or colors and she is one healthy little girl. So am I actually, I get over  colds within a few days and haven't gotten sick in years. I take no medications at all and am perfectly healthy.

Before becoming a vegetarian I had all kinds of problems. I had irritable bowl syndrome which caused terrible stomach pain, anxiety, depression, bad skin, borderline diabetes and more. I also had many "lady problems" and was struggling with that. About three years later I got pregnant while being a vegetarian and had a wonderful pregnancy and gave birth naturally to a healthy little girl.

I titled this post Stopping The Cycle because that is what I am doing for my daughter Lily. I still have a very hard time resisting the foods that I love so much Pizza, Chinese food, deserts, cheeseburgers and pretty much everything I don't eat now. It is not easy for me to be a vegan I struggle with it every day. I believe that being vegan is one of the healthiest diets that there is and plan on raising my daughter vegan as long as she will let me. However I want to make it easier for her by feeding her all the vegan foods now so that she will develop the taste buds for healthy whole foods. I am hoping that when she grows up that she will crave strawberries instead of strudels and tasty vegetables instead of meats. I am trying to raise the healthiest little girl that I can and not pass my unhealthy eating habits down to her.

I need to Get This Out Of My Head...It bothers me when I see parents feeding there kids "junk food" Especially when the child is not old enough to speak ans ask for it. I also don't understand why people don't link food to health. If you build a building with twigs and glue it will not stand long. If you fuel your body with unhealthy food what makes you think that you will live a long life? Or do they not care about how long they live? I don't know about you but I want to stay in this world for as long as I can and will fight to do so. I will not take my body for granted anymore, I will not feel invincible and wait until it is too late, I will fill my body and my families bodies with good food so that we can have as many days together as possible. I will Stop The Cycle and do what I feel is best for my family and myself.

I have created a website to help families find fun ways to lead healthy, happy lives. Its is called ChildhoodObesityInAmerica.com. There you can find fun ideas like cooking games for kids,  Lawn Games for the whole family, dance video games. kids exercise equipment, an inflatable water park, seltzer makers for kicking soda addictions and much much more. I am trying to spread the word about childhood obesity because it is a deadly epidemic that is plaguing the American kids of today. Obesity can lead to an early grave for many of its victims so parents need to provide there children with fun ways to beat this terrible epidemic.

Other Great Ways To Get Kids healthy 

Sprinklers For Kids
A Kids basketball Hoop

Family Cookbook
Plug and Play Dance Video games
An Under Sink Water Filter
Breastfeeding and Pumping
The Breville juice Fountain Elite Juicer
A Kids Punching Bag

Indoor Trampoline
Aerobics For Kids
A Tumbling Mat
Balance Bikes
Rollerblades For Kids
The Flexible Flyer Swingset
BestBalanceBikes.com
InflatableWaterSlidesForSale.net

Get What Out Of My Head?

I often don't speak my mind for the risk of hurting or offending others. For the past few years I have tried finding my voice and have managed  to  piss some people off with the things that I have to say.

I have been told that I am a sweet heart and couldn't yell at someone even  if I tried. There seems to be only one person in my life right now who I can show my anger towards. The love of my life, Justin. We have been together since 1998 and I love him very much. I can scream at him and over react all I want and he never leaves me.

However there are people who have walked over me, disrespected me, hurt my feelings and I say nothing to them. I can speak openly to Justin and some of my loved ones about how people make me feel but I cant seem to find the confidence that I need in order to confront the ones who have hurt me. I keep my feelings in my heart and in my head but they only grow bigger and hurt more in there. They can make me resentful, negative and angry  sometimes.

I am  a sensitive person and  I try respecting all living things. I am passionate about spreading the word about  Childhood Obesity and I care very much about equal rights, nutrition and health. There are so many things that piss me off in life like racism, prejudice, ignorance, sexism, insensitivity, and so much more.

The only way I know how to make myself feel better is to speak my mind.  I still worry about hurting  people and often put there feelings before my own. Hopefully I will be that person I long to be soon and will start getting these thoughts Out Of My Head!